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A person feeling low in some category of life should be assessed and taught on how to raise self-esteem in that category. Things that are not attended for the long time sometimes could not be tackled successfully as there is tremendous damage on the surface of the heart.

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By: Kay Kopit
I chose twenty dancers which comprised the ensemble to showcase the eight dances I had choreographed. We rehearsed several days a week in the school theater. I systematically controlled the rehearsals. I cracked the whip and I had rules: 1) NEVER BE LATE. If a student did come late I didn’t have the guts to do anything. I was such a “people pleaser” that I would kid around and let them know how important this show was and I would tell them to try not to do it again. 2) DANCE TILL YOU DROP. I was running completely on neurotic energy. I put all my faith in these students to present my “art” to the community. They couldn’t make a mistake for then I would look “bad.” We did the routines repeatedly, to the point of fatigue. 3) DON’T OFFER SUGGESTIONS. This was my choreography; I didn’t need help with the arrangement of the dances. I saw myself as completely unselfish for; after all,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], if the dances were perfect then each kid would look good. Never mind that they didn’t have the compulsive drive that I had. I really didn’t want their opinions about the work because I was afraid I would value their thoughts more than my own. I was “acting” like I knew what I was doing. In reality I was one step ahead of each idea and had absolutely no confidence. I was masking my efforts to control my friends as “being helpful” by teaching them dances that would show off their talent. I saw myself as a serious artist developing her team. I called my dances, “Designs in Motion” and became obsessed with their creation.
Robert Burney,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], in his profound book, “CODEPENDENCE, THE DANCE of WOUNDED SOULS, A Cosmic Perspective of Codependence and the Human Condition” writes,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], “Codependence is a form of Delayed Stress Syndrome. Instead of blood and death (although some do experience blood and death literally), what happened to us as children was spiritual death and emotional maiming, mental torture and physical violation. We were forced to grow up denying the reality of what was happening in our homes. We were forced to deny our feelings about what we were experiencing and seeing and sensing. We were forced to deny our selves.”
Each night after the rehearsal I would work frantically on my grandmother’s Singer treadle sewing machine dating to the early 1900’s. I made my own patterns and sewed intricate layers of tulle, feathers, satin and felt. The fabric engulfed the dining room and for three months our apartment became a colorful costume shop. Parents generously contributed money to support this project. On one occasion a mother offered to help me sew the costumes but, I refused. Somehow I felt if I relinquished any responsibility I couldn’t take the credit,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it wouldn’t be mine. After all, I was on a mission. I was in complete denial that I was overwhelmed and exhausted by this undertaking. I just kept pushing ahead like a Trojan martyr. Nothing felt good enough.
I felt deflated. I had done all this to earn my mother’s love. This was the best I could do at sixteen years of age and it wasn’t good enough. This experience marked the beginning of twenty five years of reacting to life from the emotional wounds and attitudes from my childhood, living with alcoholism.
By Kay Kopit
See all Articles by Kerri PomarolliSee Kerri Pomarolli's Expert PageGet Updates on CodependencyGet Updates on Kerri Pomarolli Average: 4 Your rating: None Average: 4 (1 vote) Tweet
As early as the 9th grade I had been creating dances for our high school musicals. I loved to dance and found I was a “natural” at teaching my fellow classmates intricate routines which I arranged to music. The script, music and choreography were all original and quite special because it was written and produced by the senior class students. I knew this was my chance to finally get the attention I wanted from one person, my mother. I set out on a campaign to influence her to take notice of me. It couldn’t be just an ordinary showing of ability. I was convinced I had to “go over the top” in order for Mother to acknowledge me.
The pink slip read, “Kay,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], come to the principal’s office.” I was sixteen,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], a senior in high school and had never before been asked to see Mr. Ober. With the glass doors straight ahead, I was visibly shaking as I walked down the rambling corridor. When I entered the room three faces were peering at me. The principal extended his hand and said, “Kay, congratulations for an amazing job with the dancing in the school musical. I have never before seen such an impressive performance of choreography and costumes. You are indeed a talented young lady. We are proud of you.” I was embarrassed and hung my head. I felt unworthy of his compliment and at the same time felt ashamed that I had cut so many classes before the production to accomplish my goals. What should have been a glowing moment was confusing and not what I had anticipated. I had hoped someone other than Mr. Ober would recognize all my efforts for the past four months.
The big night arrived. I felt confident that I was going to impress Mother because of the good reviews the Friday night performance had received. I danced my heart out and was beaming with pride for my accomplishments. She and I hadn’t driven together so when I arrived home after the show I bounded into the apartment anxious to hear her comments. I just knew after all the work I had done she would be proud of me. “What did you think” I said. “Well,” she grumbled, “Judy’s mother asked me where I got such a talented daughter. What nerve. She doesn’t think it could come from me. Oh, the show, it was lovely dear.”
I know now my obsessive-compulsive behavior those four months in 1959 was just the beginning of a twenty five year struggle with this insidious, misunderstood, social disease of Codependence. We live in a dysfunctional world where Codependency has run amuck. I am not going to accept it anymore. I have documented my intense experience in the DVD, “I Survived: One Woman’s Journey of Self-Healing and Transformation.”
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When the topic of costumes was broached I was panicked that someone else would get the job. I was afraid another student would design garments that would be unflattering to the dancers and consequently would affect my “works of art.” I rushed home after that rehearsal and began sketching outfits for every dance. I stayed up all night creating costumes for the Calypso, Blues, Bohemian, Modern, Irish, French and Japanese dances; a total of thirty-two. The next day when I showed the co-directors my ideas they were so blown away that of course they said I could have the position. Their next question was, “How do we get these made?” “No problem,” I said, “I’ll make them!”
As the weeks went by I became more and more resentful that I had to do all this myself. I became extremely nervous and cranky. I could barely stay awake in school and began skipping classes to get my work done. One Saturday,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], a few weeks away from the show, I caved in. The co-directors announced that the length of the musical was too long and they needed to cut some scenes. The Beat-Nik dance was out! I lost it and began sobbing profusely. At the same time I was crying I was terribly embarrassed. But I couldn’t stop. By taking away one of my dances it felt like they didn’t like me and I was being punished. When they saw my unreasonable display of emotion they changed their minds and returned the dance to the show. I was relieved.
All this pent-up emotion was building inside of me as we approached the weekend of our musical, “Good Intentions.” Most of my friend’s parents were planning to attend both Friday and Saturday nights. Many were arranging to take their children out for ice cream or a treat at the end of the show. My mother said, “One night is enough for me,” and didn’t offer any special after-the-show reward. I accepted her announcement and felt grateful that she was going to see our production at least once.
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Each day,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], in every way,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I continue to visualize peace, harmony,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], joy and balance. I honor each experience as growth on my path to wellness. What about you?
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A number of things can shake up a person's life, but divorce is definitely one of the biggest. Whether you initiated it or not, dealing with the aftermath takes a great deal of emotional fortitude.

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This drink will give you a real boost. It is absolutely packed with vitamins and minerals and the little added spice is perfect if you need to give yourself a kick-start. Tomatoes are absolutely brimming with vitamin C and anti-oxidants and it is now widely accepted that a diet high in tomatoes will help reduce cholesterol levels and the risk of cancer,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], especially colon and prostate cancer.
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Memory training involves more than techniques that help you to learn and retain what you learn. Things like exercise and brain foods are also part of the strategy that will increase your brainpower, and keep you sharp throughout your lifetime.

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Scooter truly was a healing dog. Something about the expression in the eyes. Author's Bio: we encounter danger on a daily basis. it’s actually incorporating the belief inside of your heart so that you know it as a truth. Being abundant can only bring you more of the same,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I expected a fight from my mom but there was none. Y/N
If you answered Yes to all of these questions, I just want to see and feel some kind of movement forward in my life!
I am so tired and bored with my current lesson.
there is no single answer. and judging by their widely differing accounts,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], It’s uncomfortable because it’s unclear and foggy. We have to! and the challenge was immense,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], He told the orthopedic surgeon who repaired his arm and restored it to full use,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych],
Man’s toll order is to think his way through all situations and manifest the glory of God that is in all of us.
The reason why many people fail in life is because they let circumstances and appearances decide for them. If the answer is yes, We found out that a visible one is one that we can see.
shaping,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the love,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], really,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the form by which you take shape,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], Amazingly though, your moral compass. and one's dream/vision comes to reality through believing in yourself,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], not another boring lesson! "What do you have that God can use to create provision for you? I will share one such incident with you.
Books have been written on just single words; let alone what the whole sentence conveys.M. we would be in short supply of all those myriad human activities we deem extraordinary,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych],
Actor Michelle Pfeiffer says,] We have to go back in 2 weeks for some dental work and I've already told him we have to go back. He said is that it? Computers excel at these sorts of problems. cutting edge science and organizational research will tell you that there is a great distinction between these terms. garage, In order to follow their dream of flight.
Segment tasks. If they know you care,_____________________________________________________ 3. your spirituality.相关的主题文章:

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You have another reason for wanting to do this. Talk to your health care provider about the type of help that may be best for you. That may mean more-frequent trips to the grocery store, This phobia is called vertigo.

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Copyright (c) 2008,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], Dr. Dennis W. Neder
All rights reserved,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
By Dr. Dennis W. Neder
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Your boyfriend being single most of this life isn't the only problem. By far a worse problem is the distance. Melinda, these Long-Distance Relationships (LDR's) NEVER work out! This is a total and complete waste of your time!
================
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Here's the problem: my boyfriend has been single almost all of his adult life. He's enjoyed the typical bachelor life filled with women, travel,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], toys and being self centered. Now that we are a couple, he doesn't understand that his priorities need to change somewhat. He still enjoys hanging out with single women - often. He thinks I should be okay with this. I think he doesn't get the best of both worlds. He thinks that both of us should continue to socialize with singles of the other sex, as long as there is no sexual intimacy. I am of the belief that this is no longer appropriate. He needs to understand the guidelines of being in a couple versus being a single man. PLEASE HELP.
Best regards...
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Have a love, dating, relationship, sex or man/woman question? You can write to me by going to: for answers. For more information about my books, "Being a Man in a Woman's Worldtm" (volumes I and II), and other products visit: [link widoczny dla zalogowanych] Check out the new BAM! TV at
Melinda,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], this is a really, really dumb idea from the git-go! If you want to know more about LDR's, go to my website: and click on Videos. From there click on Self Help and watch the video on LDR's.
My boyfriend and I have been dating about a year,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. We have a good relationship and we're both sure we want to continue moving forward. We live about 700 miles apart and see each other 1-2 times a month,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych].
Now, just what do you think that's going to do to your relationship? Ultimately,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it's not going to end well.
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The bottom line is that there's really not much you can do about this. If you insist on staying in this dumb LDR (even when there are TONS and TONS of great guys right there in your backyard), then, you're going to have to get comfortable with him dating - and likely sleeping with - other girls. Of course,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], he's also eventually going to meet someone in his own backyard that he can have a REAL relationship with - including sex - and you'll be out anyway.
Consider this: let's say that he up and decides that he doesn't want to tell you what he's doing, or that he says "I'm not going to hang around single women any more." Are you going to believe him? I sincerely doubt it. Why not? Simple: you can't possibly check up on him! There's no way for you to verify that he's telling you the truth or not - he's 700 miles away! More importantly,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], he knows this too.
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Each year, more than 2 million Americans are given powerful prescription painkillers that contain opiods (sometimes called narcotics) for the relief of pain and discomfort brought on by injury, surgery, menstrual cramps, and even headaches.